I am a Scottish stand up comic, actor and playwright. Also am published author of “Handstands in the Dark” my critically acclaimed memoir. I work all over the world, either on tour with comedy or theatre. Follow my stories daily and catch up with my unique life.
The smell of Christmas, Jedward, use of fear and panic tactics to advance "the project" and record all our phone calls mails and brower sessions, we are manipulated all the time in everything we do Janey.
hey janey loved your book even tho it was heart breaking I am also a glasgow lass born in medwyn street but evacuated to the farm land in the war.Sorry to be nosey but what happened to the pub when you and sean walked away from it,(good for you)and also what happened to your rot brothers-in-law? bye the way what is ashley a lovely looking girl more…
Mmm - seriously disconcerting recent news that you have to diet rather than exercise to lose weight. I love exercise, I hate dieting. You are punishing yourself toooo much trying to give up smoking and dieting at the same time... more…
At least you realised once the kissing began that they were girls, imagine if you hadn't and had phoned the police to report a pervy paedophile on the train taking advantage of a young boy!!
I think that the girls writing on dead peoples pages is just to help them and the reason they use this bizarre language is because it is the one that the more…
Don't kill anyone or you will be doing one-woman shows in Holloway!
I hope she feels better soon, it is horrible to feel crappy and have to drink loads of water which tastes of nothing when you would much rather have a jack and coke or whatever her poison of choice is.
Great luck with the show x more…
We have to pay for all plastic carriers here, it is a government levy so everyone uses the ones that cost a couple of euro but supposedly last forever - yeah right! I love the shopping trolley, but as I go in the car, lifting the bugger in might be a bit of a problem, might buy one for the local shops though.
there were virgins in Scotland i more…
I remember in the 60s being sent age 4 to buy pork chops from the butchers van in our street - though my kids find this impossible to believe, as they were not allowed past the front gate on their own until they were 10. more…
Don't worry about how many times you've "tried" to give up, that doesn't mean you failed - it means you succeeded for varying amounts of time on several occasions. Loads of exercise is a good antidote more…
I am with you on the book buying, a great way to get a bargain and the only way I will pay to read authors that i have never heard of!
Good luck off the weed, I have been off this time since December, am saving all the cash i would have spent too and it is mounting nicely.
Are you doing the Bulmers comedy thing in Ireland? more…
Hi everyone. We succeed only as we identify in life, or in war, or in anything else, a single overriding objective, and make all other considerations bend to that one objective. Help me! Need information about: Some of the specific cards ranked with broad debates remain from the prominent resumes such in the dozen of members, the pile in the roe de more…
Badly need your help. Genius is one per cent inspiration, ninety-nine per cent perspiration.
I am from Sierra and learning to read in English, please tell me right I wrote the following sentence: "Just the assumption seems out, the short-selling can also write up the studying losses in the run and proceed it attempt down to pay it the potenti more…
OMG well done. Sounds like it has been a blast for you and without swearing - I couldn't do it so i take my hat off to you for being able to stand up sober in front of an audience without using bad language x more…
Recent comments (30)
In response to: "Note to my teenage self" 1 day old
by marigold [Member]
Got half way through this and it's making me cry so I'll read the rest tomorrow xxx more…
In response to: "This is how I live" 1 day old
by marigold [Member]
Oh Janey, you're so class. I wish I could just drag you round with me to say all the things to people that I'm too timid and pathetic to say... more…
In response to: "This is how I live" 4 days old
by huncamunca [Member]
Very interesting :) more…
In response to: "This is how I live" 5 days old
by trintrin1x [Member]
You went into the "jungle" when you went into Easterhouse (only kiddin):)) xx more…
In response to: "I can smell Christmas coming can you?" 10 days old
by deleted user [Visitor]
Your really doing great!.I appreciate it. I will come back again soon...
Estate Agent
London Apartments
more…
In response to: "I can smell Christmas coming can you?" 11 days old
by ianrthorpe [Member]
The smell of Christmas, Jedward, use of fear and panic tactics to advance "the project" and record all our phone calls mails and brower sessions, we are manipulated all the time in everything we do Janey.
To the barricades I say :D more…
In response to: "I can smell Christmas coming can you?" 11 days old
by deleted user [Visitor]
NOPE more…
In response to: "Just me again" 17 days old
by brokendownangel Pro
Are you still off the fags too? Love the 'babytalk' brilliant aren't they? hope you get the job x more…
In response to: "1000th Blog and still typing" 25 days old
by sparkles101 [Member]
:wave: hi there :D brilliant news and congratulations on your 1000th Blog!!! yeyeye!!! :>> ;D Fabulous! X more…
In response to: "Me talking again" 29 days old
by betty [Visitor]
hey janey loved your book even tho it was heart breaking I am also a glasgow lass born in medwyn street but evacuated to the farm land in the war.Sorry to be nosey but what happened to the pub when you and sean walked away from it,(good for you)and also what happened to your rot brothers-in-law? bye the way what is ashley a lovely looking girl more…
In response to: "Get me peace" 30 days old
by thehomelyyear Pro
Mmm - seriously disconcerting recent news that you have to diet rather than exercise to lose weight. I love exercise, I hate dieting. You are punishing yourself toooo much trying to give up smoking and dieting at the same time... more…
In response to: "Let me tell you something" 33 days old
by brokendownangel Pro
Ah, that is a nice story, just shows books shouldn't be judged by their covers - everyone has a story that just needs someone to listen to it x more…
In response to: "I am politically incorrect" 45 days old
by brokendownangel Pro
At least you realised once the kissing began that they were girls, imagine if you hadn't and had phoned the police to report a pervy paedophile on the train taking advantage of a young boy!!
I think that the girls writing on dead peoples pages is just to help them and the reason they use this bizarre language is because it is the one that the more…
In response to: "Hollywood Rapists and shouting" 51 days old
by marigold [Member]
The Jarrow marchers got given suits, they mostly pawned them apparently. He could do that... more…
In response to: "It was a dark time for all" 61 days old
by brokendownangel Pro
Don't kill anyone or you will be doing one-woman shows in Holloway!
I hope she feels better soon, it is horrible to feel crappy and have to drink loads of water which tastes of nothing when you would much rather have a jack and coke or whatever her poison of choice is.
Great luck with the show x more…
In response to: "Shopping Bags…and Dead Men" 70 days old
by brokendownangel Pro
We have to pay for all plastic carriers here, it is a government levy so everyone uses the ones that cost a couple of euro but supposedly last forever - yeah right! I love the shopping trolley, but as I go in the car, lifting the bugger in might be a bit of a problem, might buy one for the local shops though.
there were virgins in Scotland i more…
In response to: "Shopping Bags…and Dead Men" 71 days old
by PeregrinePickles [Member]
I remember in the 60s being sent age 4 to buy pork chops from the butchers van in our street - though my kids find this impossible to believe, as they were not allowed past the front gate on their own until they were 10. more…
In response to: "Double Denim is in" 71 days old
by IanPeterHall [Member]
This is great. You made me laugh hard. A Chinless society... I think this idea has legs for a short film. more…
In response to: "Yes, I have stopped smoking again" 73 days old
by thehomelyyear Pro
Didn't realsise you had written Handstands... - a truly memorable book more…
In response to: "Yes, I have stopped smoking again" 73 days old
by thehomelyyear Pro
Don't worry about how many times you've "tried" to give up, that doesn't mean you failed - it means you succeeded for varying amounts of time on several occasions. Loads of exercise is a good antidote more…
In response to: "Maybe its time to be me again" 74 days old
by marigold [Member]
Being a crossword clue is awesome to the max!! more…
In response to: "Yes, I have stopped smoking again" 74 days old
by the_real_linda [Member]
If that makes you give up smoking then alls good, GO IZZARD!!!
Caught you on "just a minute" last week... hope your on again, just so funny... I'm sure you'll get better at it. more…
In response to: "Yes, I have stopped smoking again" 75 days old
by brokendownangel Pro
I am with you on the book buying, a great way to get a bargain and the only way I will pay to read authors that i have never heard of!
Good luck off the weed, I have been off this time since December, am saving all the cash i would have spent too and it is mounting nicely.
Are you doing the Bulmers comedy thing in Ireland? more…
In response to: "Mothers Day in NZ- A Poem." 78 days old
by Magnus [Visitor]
Hi everyone. We succeed only as we identify in life, or in war, or in anything else, a single overriding objective, and make all other considerations bend to that one objective. Help me! Need information about: Some of the specific cards ranked with broad debates remain from the prominent resumes such in the dozen of members, the pile in the roe de more…
In response to: "Maybe its time to be me again" 79 days old
by brokendownangel Pro
What a busy exciting life you lead, it must be quite nice to deal with all things domestic inbetween times too x more…
In response to: "Mothers Day in NZ- A Poem." 81 days old
by Ophira [Visitor]
Badly need your help. Genius is one per cent inspiration, ninety-nine per cent perspiration.
I am from Sierra and learning to read in English, please tell me right I wrote the following sentence: "Just the assumption seems out, the short-selling can also write up the studying losses in the run and proceed it attempt down to pay it the potenti more…
In response to: "The Night it all went wrong" 90 days old
by brokendownangel Pro
Glad you feel better so soon, but I now feel a bit queasy as i was munching a cheese roll whilst reading this lolx more…
In response to: "What A week!" 92 days old
by brokendownangel Pro
OMG well done. Sounds like it has been a blast for you and without swearing - I couldn't do it so i take my hat off to you for being able to stand up sober in front of an audience without using bad language x more…
In response to: "Yet another late blog" 98 days old
by g1234gg1234g [Member]
Left by the the passer.=] more…
In response to: "You know how late I am don’t you?" 100 days old
by Sienna Pro
What a fucking cunt... ;) more…